When I heard this week that a disbarred attorney and his wife were shot in Chappaqua, I assumed it was the Clintons. But it turns out it was the other disbarred attorney and wife on the Clintons’ cul de sac.

Carlos Perez-Olivo was disbarred recently for stealing bail money; his clients were “murder defendants and other violent felons,” according to the New York Daily News. The couple moved to Chappaqua about three months ago.

Asked for comment about their new neighbors’ brush with death, the Clintons said, “We’re just relieved that we’re no longer the slimiest couple on the block.”